Painting, Gardens and Jam

Our first crop of arugula has turned into a fluttering cloud of white blossoms, like a flock of little cabbage moths, levitating next to the hose reel. I need to put in another crop of spinach, (maybe some malabar spinach for hot weather?) and a new block of carrots. The boys have been so excited about our first round of carrots at this house that they have been pulling them as little finger sized snacks and munching them before they get any chance to get big and hearty. Love that delicious, culinary impatience.  Need to remind myself that they do indeed love things that are good them, in addition to the pizza and chips that magnet all kids right in. I tend to blow the negatives bigger and discount the positives and end up with a nicely lopsided view of what really happened with my kids.

The whole house smells amazing tonight. I just batch cooked some apple muffins to put in the freezer (flour and sugar free!) so that those junk food loving boys have something sweet to grab for a snack. There is also a second big pan full of cherry plum jam bubbling away in the back burner. It smells tangy sweet and I have added just the right amount of sweetener to leave it zippy in the back of the mouth but still sweet in the front. Love me some sweet tart flavors. The first batch was made with greener plums that were still pretty firm but had all fallen anyway. This round, the plums were all making big cranberry colored splats on the sidewalk when they fell, finding ones that were still whole and hadn't squished on impact was the trickiest part. They have more natural sugars this time and when you pop them in your mouth raw, the skin slips off and leaves you with a big juicy mouthful. So delicious!

I haven't been painting so much this week but, I am chewing on a couple of ideas and am hoping that the long weekend will be a chance to pull out my brushes and sit in the sunshine and drip some art out through my fingertips. Recently, I saw the good friend who spoke painting prophetically into my life and convinced me that I was a painter when I thought I loved art but only knew how to draw. I am so grateful for her insistent warmth and pushing.

 So much happy that this habit bloomed out in my life and I had a time when I shared art days with her. She still lives in New England and I had a quick breakfast with her while we were in town, its so amazing to see my art on her wall and come home to see hers on mine and know that we have entered each other's lives and flavored each other's world's so sparklingly. Good friends are the type who make you a better person for their having been in your life. She qualifies.

Things That Matter

We are working and working on settling in....I keep taking more things out to the garage again, we keep finding spots for things to live, this week I put up some pictures on the walls and the boys and I bought bulbs (science, you know) and double used them as biology lesson and garden improvement. The garden has suffered, the whole yard has from vigorous tiny-male use and motherly neglect while I have been working on the inside. So many balls to juggle.

Last night something gave and I stayed up....way past my bedtime...I snapped and washed every single dish in the whole house, then swept the floor, then wiped down the counters and polished the stove. And then, I had a cup of tea.

And then I got out my paints in the quiet glow of the office and I made colors swirl together and image magically appear on the blank page...until about 3am. So beautiful, so feeding, so irresponsible. Tonight I am going to bed early.

Boxes matter, dishes matter, gardening matters, school work matters....but painting in a silent house with a mug of tea beside you matters too.

Chickens and Togetherness

This week it is spring, edging into summer. The roses are opening...the lawn needs constant babysitting and we wake up every morning to birdsong and open windows. Its beautiful and chaotic and relieving and its smells amazing outdoors.

A is finally back home after nearly a month away from us on the other side of the country. Its been both ridiculously hard to have him gone (we're staying very connected emotionally) and also so amazing to find our stride and realize that we as a family can actually hack insane things like living on two coasts periodically. Pom misses his Daddy more than he ever has before when A travels and he during this trip he did things like breakdown sobbing inconsolably at the sound of his voice over the phone. Its touching to see him getting more verbal and also more clear about his own feelings and about intangible things like missing someone who isn't present: 3 years old approaches.

The chickens are laying well and may be driving the neighbors crazy with their egg calls which thankfully happen when people are mostly at work and houses in the neighborhood are empty. We have to remember to check the coop twice a day to make sure that we don't end up with any silly broody hens or egg eating, because there are always 6 a day now. I have started bringing the girls a cabbage a week to entertain them and give extra summer vitamins. I am also tossing any weeds from the garden into their pen for eating and am impressed with how much them do actually seem to be able to tear off and consume. Chickens are funny because they don't have any teeth or sharp cutting tools and are mostly adapted for eating loose seeds and small bugs that can be gulped whole or else ripping off bits of leaves attached to rooted plants. When I toss in whole weeds I think a lot of them just get trampled since when they pluck on them the whole plant comes along, but if they get into a tug-of-war everyone can actually pull off pieces and sometimes I see a hen use her foot for a tool to hold down the food and help tear it apart.

My sister Lockbox is engaged! That's the other bit of really exciting news around our house. Lots of our idle talk these days is diamond admiring, dress discussion and flower arrangement planning. So much ethereal planning to savor and witness. A wedding is a pretty deliciously cheery occasion, and more importantly I am so pleased for my sister and her man. They're so happy together and the new brother is infinitely approved of.

I have taken a season off of doing a lot of personal watercolor painting this past semester because I was teaching a middle and high school class for our homeschool co-op but now that the school year has ended...I'm free to paint by myself again! I'm so glad I taught, it was empowering (never taught art before!) and fun. I'm hoping to start back to my artist group that meets on Tuesdays this week and cannot wait to get back to the brushes. I might need a trip to the art store for more fresh paper!Yum!

Eyeball Color Theories

My sister brought the above book home from the library. We are now obsessed and up to our eyeballs in visual self-analysis. Its one of those "find your colors" kinds of guides and since I have spent years working on figuring out what colors I should wear and yet still feel a little befuddled....my appetite is handily whetted.

So confusing trying to sort out all the pieces and make sense of it. So much of color is psychology and meaning, personal taste layered on top of actual objective reality. For years I hated the colors orange and teal (I can't even remember why....I was insane.) and now I have trouble accepting colors like mauve and beige but I think its mostly about ideas and stories I tell myself about the colors.

My sister Foxy and I....plus a photo-bombing baby! She has my un-bleached, natural hair color.

I think I am a Summer or a Spring but its hard for my to sort out the cool and warm color bits. I wish in some ways we were still in the 80's when it was trendy to have your "colors done" and come away with a purse pocket swatch for handy referencing.

My sister Lockbox and I....similar but not exactly the same.

We are reading all kinds of cool things though....examine your eyes in detail and notice all the colors in them: the darkest colors, the rays, the softest muted shades, take a look at the veins in your wrists and look for shades of blue, green and purple, and take notes on the colors you blush when pinched and the darkest and lightest colors in your hair. So fun noticing the details of yourself! The artist in me loves these assignments. This is the nature of being a painter...not seeing "blue" skies but noticing that sometimes the sky is purple and sand and aquamarine but almost never just "blue." Real observing. Its a Buddhist kind of fashion assignment really. Being in The Now, truly present and fully aware.

Detail of my multi-colored eyes.

May there be clarity! May there be fresh green knowledge! May there be in my future a cashmere sweater in the perfect shade!

Art Resurgence

I have come full-circle in my artistic endeavors.This past fall I left my art fellowship group where I was painting weekly to attend a homeschool co-op with my boys, devote myself more thoroughly to the forming of curricula and schedules and the role of teacher. I thought I'd figure something out artistically, I thought maybe I could self-power, I thought maybe homeschooling was suddenly going to be overwhelming and exhausting. Sometimes things aren't quite as we think.

Turns out, homeschooling this year was pretty similar to last year. 1st grade is basically like quality preschool (lots of open-ended play, outdoor exploration, lots of fabulous read-alouding, family art projects and lots of rabbit traily "looking things up" at random) with the addition of beginning reading and math instruction. So, A took math...and all that was really new in our life was teaching reading. I decided I could hack it after all...and maybe I didn't HAVE to be part of a co-op but could more generally depend on a homeschool social circle for interesting events whenever we felt like it.

And as for my free-lance art motivation...heh. Its takes a village y'all. I found that I meant to get around to painting, I meant to finish pieces, I meant to replenish my supplies but what really happened was that I painted two pieces all year...and mostly I did nothing and a small piece of me withered inside.

I quit the co-op. We will be part of the homeschool group and join them for Field Trip Fridays and park outings and all the usual birthday parties and holiday celebrations instead. And I re-joined my art group. I am re-committing to taking that little bit of time away, without the kids, devoted to growth and skill development, and especially ear marked for creative expression. I need the excuse of regular time built into my life, a babysitter downstairs to keep the little ones out of my hair and the physical presence of other artists around me fact-checking and evaluating my efforts. So, here's to growth and art and finally finishing this painting that I worked on for most of the school year and just finally completed.

Rugs Bloom In This Heat

When it is hotter than can be believed outside, I hide. While hiding I: read extra, drink inordinate amounts of seltzer with ice and re-discover all the little projects I wanted to accomplish in our house. I have been painting trim like mad and spackling little dings and holes and nail pokes in all the walls. I established a secure relationship with our drill (I can now drill in and reverse out all screws with straight confidence...no fear). I made and hung tissue flowers from the dining room ceiling and then got all inspired and re-organized the pantry. But sometimes the best projects come on you in a fit of random inspiration....

One very lazy day I began to doodle on a plain green carpet I'd picked up at a local tag sale and the paint and doodling just kept on creeping along. Pretty soon there was a long trailing bloom explosion expanding pinkly from one corner of the plain, faded green. I passed through several stages of terrified and exhilerated while painting...worrying by turns that I was destroying the rug or exulting over having really *made* the rug work. I love it. Sometimes you just have to take leaps and do crazy random things because the spirit moved you, urges can be genius.

Sister Paint

Lockbox and I together are a little combustive. I don't mean that we conflict but more that like a combustive engine we are a positively explosive combo. The two of us here in the house means that suddenly we're caught up on the washing, planning art projects, starting new books with the boys and randomly busting open cans of wall paint! Huzzah!

The other night when we were sitting around together, plotting the final hours before A came home and what still needed to be finished...we got the urge to paint. With no real warning we found ourselves in the dining room with paint and brushes, screeching all the furniture to the center of the room and skipping the whole taping off the edges part. Bam. The dining room is that beautiful Swedish grey I've been contemplating. I went with the darker color that I wasn't sure I was brave enough to try and we repainted all the gloss white trim to contrast.

I love it.

Lockbox is galvanizing for me. She tells me to go ahead and do the things I am bashfully considering and then volunteers to hold the ladder.

Love sisters.

Carpe Minutum!

Am feeling a little more in control of my life again at the moment which I realize is probably a passing fancy here, on the brink of The Holidays...but hey! Today I took the kids to their first theatrical production and left the baby for the first time...(He did great, my friend Nutmeg rocks!) and feeling thus emboldened...I decided to paint a little. There are such ugly risers on our stairs...potentially pretty but so scuffed and chipped and splotched with various colors that they are pretty uninspiring. Have been itching to paint them a nice gloss white for ages and ages. Why not now?!? Since dinner is in the crockpot, the kids are asleep and I don't have to dash out again for the afternoon doctor's appointment for another half an hour...I'm all over it. Ha! Feels so good!

Am trying to become an expert at carpe diem and even more realistically in my life carpe minutum...seize the minute. My life is a woven thatch of moments right now and so there are not often whole days but there are always moments. Must read more books and less reflexive facebook checking, must clean one little spot, sort one little box, lay out an outfit for one child and spend less time standing there wondering what I was doing, wishing I had more energy or lying in bed hitting snooze. There is a place in life for letting go and relaxing your mind and your frenetic To Do List but there's also a lot to be said for doing little things here and there to make your life more peaceful and happy and productive. Am ever inspired to do better with what I have....better than most people say I have any right to expect I can be. Thus we achieve...by trying.

Trimming My Sails

English: Paintbrush Português: Trincha (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

The radiator, segueing from old dingy white to glossy new white.

The sun is shining, the tomatoes are pouring in, the weather is finally cool enough to stand and the mosquitoes are thicker than thieves in our yard. My speckled legs bear testament. Urgh. So...I'm painting indoors for respite.

Before Trim

After Trim!

 The trim in the boy's bath is finally getting a glossy coat of white and I'm humming away. Coming along, isn't it? I'm so excited about the whole project. I think this room may really end up looking miles better. I adore the cool aqua blue on the walls and shiny white trim always makes me feel better. Have a peek!

The baby has learned to stay asleep for a reasonable amount of time and little jobs like this don't require any taping or hauling out of drop cloths. I could do picky detail work like this all day long. I love being down on my hands and knees with a bitty brush, trying to be sure to go right up to the very edge. What does that mean about me? Something important I'm sure.

All Abuzz

Am abuzz with a million little projects around the house. Since painting the hallway I have painted the entryway, painted a little cupboard that stands there to be a foyer catch-all/storage piece, hung a new piece of art, re-arranged the mantle display over the fireplace, sourced a free dresser for my boys room and moved clothes into it, pruned the lilac and finally I hung up my necklace collection that has been living sprawled all over the top of my dresser. Hooray! Whew!

Am feeling sometimes busy and sometimes accomplished and then sometimes way behind the ball when I look at all the astounding numbers of projects waiting for attention. Writing out the list of things that are all finished so that I can look at them in one long queue is boosting. Does anyone else add things to their To Do List that you already did so that you can feel you've got something done? It's a silly mind game but knowing the games is sometimes what makes the difference.