Your Plans Are As Unique As You

      Halloween was last night which means that today is the beginning of Christmas for me. I know it sounds overblown to some and like we are perhaps jumping the gun but this is the way that I can maintain sanity as a mama. If I give myself more time, I can enjoy my pumpkin spice lattes and the leaves turning color while I plan my gift lists and read to the kids from the holiday book basket. Its the best time ever to get my ducks in a row and even to get a little private celebrating in before we are traveling. One of the hardest things about traveling for the holidays is the feeling of no personal celebration, no ability to be the mama myself for the holidays.  We are all living our own individual lives and I know that part the secret to my own happiness is an earlier and earlier start on the holiday season. I use a Christmas planner and a couple of books in a haphazard fashion, I scroll Pinterest and I scribble lists on odd papers....and also, I fly by the seat of my pants. This is me after all.

None of those formulas for how many gifts to buy or when exactly you should begin making cookies and storing them in the freezer are exactly right for any exact year in my exact life. I do like the concept though....so I try to come up with my own personal targets and magpie into my plans those that do seem to align. The point is to enjoy and relish the bustle and prep, the weight of responsibility that comes with being a merriment creator and the freedom and mental space that can come from a little more time coupled with some plans and systems.

This week I am revamping our breakfast menus and schedules for some of the same goals: more space, simplicity, bustle, and responsible feeling motherhood. There are things to put in line and ways to trim our old meal ideas so that they fit our new schedule and the changing interests of the palates in our home. I wish we fit some vanilla template but none of these things work that way. We nature journal, but not like anybody tells you to. I just bought, leafed through and then sold a book on How To Teach Your Child Shakespeare because we were doing bits of it already, some things were useful additions and lots of it needed to be passed on because we have a plan, its just the one that we are creating ourselves at our kitchen table. Its an interesting evolution to see myself both becoming a planner and also recognizing that for our individual house, nobody can hand me the plan. Plans are dynamic and shifting, we outgrow them and get bored by them, and all of our households quirky oddments will never be in anybody else's list.

Here's the marching to the beat of our own drums...ah yes, but marching to a beat! Lets all plan our own plans and come up with systems by being the wise observers and sensitive curators of our own people and lives. There's no easy out, nobody can do the work of life for you. But, after all....Halloween was just last night, you have time and so do I.  

Words On The Platter

     Sometimes, in order to get going again we have to push the ball down the hill in some small way. I have been long fallow here and now I'm back and grinding away like Sisyphus but in an attempt to help things take on their own momentum and joy, I'm just going light. This is my little kick off the edge.....here I am, with my pen in my hand again.

Lets just marinate in some goods words, shall we? It seems like a good way to begin. Here are some of my own, personal favorites. Which ones did I miss that you love the sound or feel of?

Utterly Enjoyable Autumn Words

Decidious

Scythe

Persimmon

Harvest

Cornucopia

Shadow

Cider

Sheaves

Snuggle

Golden

Quilt

September

Russet

Blaze

Fog

Rusted

Flannel

Crimson

Chanterelle

Meander

Crackling

Maple

Smoke

Squash

Harvest

Spider

Candle

Crisp

Aspen

Marigold

Hazel

Scarlet

 

And then, just because delicious words make me think of poetry, in a When You Give A Moose A Muffin Style....lets have a classic poem by James Whitcomb Riley. I like to imagine my farming great-grandpa, suddenly possessed of a desire to write poems speaking out these lines while he stumps along from orchard to barnyard to his masonry trimmed farmhouse where I was this summer. I miss him and I wish he could know my little boys and that I could marinade in his comforting presence and imagine they will turn out sturdy and reliable and warm, like him.

When the Frost is on the Punkin

BY JAMES WHITCOMB RILEY

When the frost is on the punkin and the fodder’s in the shock,

And you hear the kyouck and gobble of the struttin’ turkey-cock,

And the clackin’ of the guineys, and the cluckin’ of the hens,

And the rooster’s hallylooyer as he tiptoes on the fence;

O, it’s then’s the times a feller is a-feelin’ at his best,

With the risin’ sun to greet him from a night of peaceful rest,

As he leaves the house, bareheaded, and goes out to feed the stock,

When the frost is on the punkin and the fodder’s in the shock.

They’s something kindo’ harty-like about the atmusfere

When the heat of summer’s over and the coolin’ fall is here—

Of course we miss the flowers, and the blossums on the trees.... (click here for the rest) 

 

The Seasons, As They Really Are

Here in the Bay Area we have arrived at September like everyone else but here it doesn't mean cooling temps and getting out the scarves and the tall boots. Just when your mind and the American Marketing Machine has you most primed for autumnal bliss, Cali has me all whip lashed. September and October usually hold the warmest, most classically summery weather. We have popsicle afternoons and pool dates and though the apples are ripe and we do indeed need to start prepping for Halloween, its best done in tank tops and shorts. 

We have not had a particularly hot summer this year and there have even been times when it felt a little too chilly so it feels so odd to remember that its expected that we get this heat wave and start using our A/C now.

I am thinking about how in the world I can catch some of that fall flavor in summery ways. I had an iced chai tea the other day because......autumn flavors + summer temps. I want to start making roasts and wearing my hair down but its time for a little bit more warm weather celebration before we get there.

Time to go apple picking and plan one last camping adventure at the same time. Californian Autumn means a different thing and I have to start adapting in my own mind to this reality that is my world and my neighborhood. I love hearing and seeing all the seasonal markers that are different here and owning that fact that we have seasons....just different ones, or even the same ones with different markers and signifiers.

I wanna be the kind of woman who is curious about her world, open to her own microsmic environment and the story that its bringing. It may not be what I am primed for, what the general public talks about or what I have ever seen before but...its mine. Really, in some ways this is the story of what I am learning as a grown-up in general the last few years. My marriage, my kids, my housekeeping, our schooling, my reading schedule, my art career, my own professional life and personal development, my spiritual unfolding...none of them seem to trot down the expected trajectory. I am trying to let go of what I thought I'd have and see and know and instead wipe the slate blank and draw what I really see, like they tell you in art. Instead of drawing the projections of my own mind and expectations, what people tell me I see or should see....instead, in faith, I'll just step into the season I am really living and try to learn to love it in all its difference, and variation and cope with the odd bits and sooth my own nerves about how it isn't what I thought it would be.

Because, truth.....its what it is and its also beautiful, even if unfamiliar.

Seasons In California

End of the plane ride....Mama losing it a little.

We had a wonderful visit back to Michigan with our two families, and were part of my youngest sister Song's wedding to Jack, the newest uncle in the tribe. Its a hard gig, suddenly finding yourself in ownership of "uncle-ing" my four wild boys and I have to say, Jack rises to the challenge. We have been quite lucky in both of the last two uncle acquisitions. My sisters know how to pick playful dudes with love of action figures, roughhousing and silly jokes...all the important things. Its an unspoken thing,  evaluating potential spouses of your siblings for the kind of uncles or aunts they will be to your kids. Never heard anybody talk about that before but it sure is important to me. You don't get to pick your own kids aunts and uncles and you sure don't get to select them when you are the kid but its  a pretty important role. I have looked up to my aunts and uncles a lot as I grew up and sometimes they have been sources of advice or assistance and more and more as I get older, they are part of my network of emotional warmth and love. There's no underrating the role that you can have in a child's life as a peripheral adult in their family who cares and is around and willing to "get" them. Determined to "aunt" more actively this year and make sure my nieces and nephews know that I care. 

The leaves on my crown here are from Michigan when we were there last week, the maples were just before peak, turning red and orange everywhere on the edges of the woods. We have many fewer maples by variety and by volume here in Northern California. I miss the trees I know well, mostly in the way one misses old friends, not because they are the only lovely trees on the planet but just because they are my "known" faces. I miss my childhood trees for familiarity and comfort, but I love all the trees I am getting to know out here. A eucalyptus or pepper tree are graceful beauties that I never knew before. I do have to share that for the amount of griping and disparaging I hear from locals about the "lack of seasons" in California (No autumn at all, so goes the rumor.) I thought the fall color was beautiful! We don't have the same ecosystem so there aren't big sweeps of maple forests which give the "hills are alive" kind of color that Michigan and Connecticut have in the fall. Most of our autumn color is out in the vineyards which all turn gold in the fall, or in the cities. There are beautiful street trees that are all turning color here, apparently unseen, because nobody points them out or talks about them much. I'm puzzled about why! The leaves on the sweet gum trees are just beginning to blush red around town now. They turn the most spectacular scarlet and so do the Japanese maples, the red maples, and the crepe myrtles. One of my favorites in fall is the ginkgo which will puts on one of the most uniform and brightly gold glow, pretty much every single leaf on the tree will turn a glowing yellow.    Here there are lots of new friends however, I love the sweet gum trees, the pepper trees, the crepe myrtles and so many more. The persimmons in our backyard will turn a dark lipsticky red too around Thanksgiving. Fall foliage is later here....coming more in November and even December than September and October and much slower and gradually. We get chilly mornings and evenings, albeit without frost and eventually after color is over the leaves will fall all over town too. We have a lot of persistant foliage too so its doesn't look as bare, but if you which streets to go down, the big leaf maple, sweet gum and sycamores leave big, unseen swathes of leaves for kicking through. Secret Autumn in Norcal.

 I harvested the first hydrangea heads to put up on the mantle today, a few of them had blown down in the first rains (the rainy season is here and starting to turn sunny days into a rarer sighting). I put a few on the front porch with our pumpkins and squashes too. Lovely to have my own decorations growing in the backyard. I have considered spray painting some gold just for subtle shimmer. Might be beautiful or might be tacky, hard to say.

The kale is still appreciating the recent trimming that I gave it and is putting out a new flush of delicious leaves. Strange to realize that there is no real point in putting it away in the freezer for winter as winter here means kale in the garden, fresh at hand. Still wrapping my mind around all that each season means. 

One of my next big projects will be making a NorCal Wheel of Seasons....with painted reminders of what things signify the changing seasons here, I'm so annoyed with everyone saying that there are none. All the world has seasons and change, we just don't all live in a Tasha Tudor book.....the world is more diverse and interesting than that. Who made New England seasons the heartbeat of what change in the natural world world means? It reminds me of the ridiculous obsession homeowners have with keeping up an green English lawn, even when it doesn't make any sense in their ecosystem. There is more than one way to enjoy a front yard or to mark the changing of the year. 

That's our cute little Orange Blossom Cottage, with the kitchen light glowing as the sun goes down. Hello to all of you, from Cali!

Destruction Day

We spent a lot of our time today working on destruction. Its the time of year for heartlessly uprooting the yellowing, flopping and barren members of the vegetable garden. The borage and squash were so prickly that I left them to black into the crisp bits of stiff stalk several weeks ago and they were still incredibly prickly. I never had enough borage in my garden to realize how very covered with tiny, crystalline needles they truly are. They are practically cacti! Astoundingly off-putting. I ended up picking them up between two trowels and forking them over to the compost can. There was a lot of dropping and accidental shredding and a few prickers in my fingers despite all my efforts. Next time, I might do well to wear gloves and consider containing the borage in future gardens. The next frontier will be putting in a few fall crops. Its funny to think about gardening year round here without even trying. The kale just gets chopped down with a larger and larger axe as the seasons wheel round and it grows new stalks from its roots or from the old stalk bases and it basically becomes a grove of kale that lives with you eternally.

The boys and I are so dead after one day a week at the co-op that we are attending. The whole next day is marked off for recovery....dinner the night of our co-op is always a deflated afterthought. I wish I could say I was organized enough to have something snug in the crockpot every week but yeah,.....truth....its like leftovers and take-out and whatever I happen to have in my canned good pantry.  I'm kind of embarassed at the way it takes the wind out of our sails. How do all of you "normal" people do it every single day? Perhaps the contrast of a whole day out and about, teaching and learning, and leaving the house early and packing lunches and filling water bottles against the backdrop of our quiet, homey normal is what is really getting us. Whatever it is...its incriminating. I feel like a total wuss! I am trying to quit beating myself up for it and give us all a little extra grace to deal with what is. Its hard to accept something that is loaded with negative meaning.

This weekend we are headed up to Lake Tahoe to hole up in a little cabin together, skip rocks across the lake and take a chilly dip in that clear, clear water. Nib is hoping desperately for some fishing and I am hoping for a peaceful, foggy morning rising alone, before the whole camp is up....the mist rising off the lake, a loon in the distance. Mommy wishes.

Autumn, Geneology and Italian Novels

Even here in California, the land of eternal sunshine and placid seasons that go stepping on fairly evenly...we have begun to notice that autumn is coming in now. The blackberries are almost done everywhere. The vines just blushing crimson and lying barren at the side of all the roads. Grapes are in, sitting heavily on every farmer's table at the market on Wednesday nights downtown. They sell every color: misty Concord blue, reds with a shine on their cheek and the pale dusted yellow ones that taste a darker sweet right before you swallow.

 The oaks on every hill have acorns beginning to drop and every walk we take brings pockets full of shiny little nuts to the laundry pile and the kitchen counter top. Such a deliciously seasonal problem. I have been collecting them when I find around the house and I now have a little heap on the kitchen window above the sink. I like how acorns and apples both glow when you polish their cheeks.

 The apple tree is still dropping fruit in the yard and the boys alternately bring the fruit eagerly to me and play kickball with them, splattering them satisfactorily against the foundation. Mommy is not so very keen on this game of course because it means a lot of scrubbing after the fruit has been discovered dried onto the wall the next day. Not all of the ideas can be good ones.

 We are working away at Latin, a new subject for us this year in our homeschool, and memorizing the locations of the European seas while I follow in real-time the travels of my Michigan pal who has gone to Italy to find her family's roots. I am also neck deep in my own genealogical obsession so the combination of travel + family history + real life geography studies has me utterly captivated. I am living off her photos and sharing them with the boys every time another one pops up like it was their father away on a business trip. They are a little mystified I think but game for whatever strange thing Mom want to show them. The fact that A's brother Miq lives in Italy right now helps them to see that there might be something interesting in the whole thing. We have been dreaming of hitting up The Mediterranean for our next big family adventure for a while. Once we thought we'd combine Morocco, France, Spain and Italy but we have been wisely counseled to avoid Moroccan water until our children are a little older. Our latest revisions of the dreamed of trip have us tooling around Italy and spending a lot of time letting our kids romp with their cousins in the castle they are renting, (not a joke) My childhood friend is making it look so very good.

Now accepting books that make you see visions of the Italian countryside and dream in Italian. Under The Tuscan Sun and......?

Fall Basics

We have been having so much fun at our house lately....although the garage does still loom, full to the brim with our excess. We are going on leaf-kicking day trips on the weekends, starting to schedule those dinners with friends and field trips with local mamas that we mean to do. We have been eating baked potatoes, carmelized onions, sausages, roast chickens and mushrooms of every kind. This afternoon I put an apple cake in the oven impulsively after we got back from our afternoon walk.

We spent more money than I like to admit on the Goodwill run for procuring supplies but we are well into the process of Halloween costumes...a mixture of purchased and hacked together. We are talking to our family regularly, spending time reading long chapter books, eating outdoors, and taking all the weekly hikes we said we would when we moved to this amazing state.

I feel like our life has finally calmed down a little and we're hitting a more normal rhythm again. Getting back to the basics has helped. I've cut objects from the house, I've cut things from our schedule, I've cut complications out of the instructions for the kids routine, I've cut dinner one night a week in favor of a cheat meal, etc. etc.  Its easy for me to get all in a dither about "things" all the many, many things that seem like they need doing and celebrating and making.

 Fall is a time to slow down....a time to curl in a little and to think more carefully about what's needed for the upcoming winter. Its basics time. I made myself a little list today of what I think is basic to fall for me....the other things that I think are important really take second chair and end up being extra credit. Here's how it looks from here, in Autumn.

Little Autumn Basics

• Harvesting something might be my number one essential. I always say I am part squirrel. Head outdoors for mushroom hunting, apple picking, nut gathering or pumpkin harvesting and kick a few leaves for extra credit. Breath deep, smell the fall air. 
• Roasting things in the oven. It can be so many things or just one delicious meal. So many good options: parsnips tossed with thyme and oil, pumpkins whole in their shells, apples stuffed with nuts and cinnamon, a big juicy beef roast, a chicken from the farmer's market or a tray of oysters topped with butter and tarragon.
• Wearing plaid. I'm a Scot and a girl from the woods and a Northern soul....flannels are my favorite. My boys all have them and I have them and my patient husband finds he keeps getting them for gifts. They keep you warm, they can dress down and add a cozy charm to outings, work days and evening snuggles by the fire. Extra credit for plaid lined jackets and wool blankets in tartan shades. 
• Seeing some colors. Go catch a brilliant maple show on a favorite local road, hike the mountains to see the aspens flare or just stay up in the cool of the evening to catch a spectacular autumn sunset. Wherever you are, even if maples and cool evenings aren't part of your world, there is "autumn color" in some form. I have to have pretty leaves...do your bit however you can.
• Thanksgiving. The origins are murky and the politics are sticky but beauty that is unquestionable remains. Family gathering is powerful and rhythmic and right, celebrating harvest and abundance and the gathering in of nature is a beautiful thing, offering gratitude to The Creator who sustains all things is peace-giving and honorable.  Bring on the turkey!
• Boiling potpourri on the stove always ends up happening. I throw in whatever I have that smells cozy....bits of pine branch, cinnamon sticks, cloves, orange peel, etc. Its fast and simple and makes me feel like housekeeper of the year and most festive girl in the neighborhood.
• Having cozy drinks is always in order in the autumn. I love fresh, raw cider, hard cider, mulled wine, hot cocoa (extra credit for cinnamon!) and chai tea myself. 
• Extra sleeping always seems to be inevitable if-not perfectly appropriate. Snug naps after chilly-aired hikes, sleeping in with the one I love on cozy weekends, hitting the hay early when the dark and the fog push us indoors and make us snoozy...so many ways to get extra zzz's and wind down the way that nature pushes us this time of year.  
• Taking long walks is rythmically autumnal to me. I grew up walking through the woods deer hunting with my papa in the fall, but it was also a time to go out for mushroom walks and follow-the-truck-down-a-two-track treks to find wild apples by the bushel. Everything in me wants to pack a napsack in fall and go stretch my legs...maybe all day! My husband grew up with trail hiking, following plotted state-park walks and looking for blazes and map following through the woods. We both like to get out and if  you call it a walk I'm un-intimidated and if you call it a hike he's eager. 

Pumpkin Pie On The Beach

 It was a beautiful day. Whatever ails you, there is little in life that a trip to the redwoods and the beach can't cure. The scenery and sights of nature here are kind of epic. Its super astonishing to keep realizing again that the things we can just zip over and see if we have an hour for driving are pretty national-park-level-of-fabulous. I am a little over-awed and feel ultra-bouyant once we are in the car and driving home from another place that's unbelievable with scenery to make you have an asthmatic episode and animals and plants from an episode of National Geographic. I'm not sure how long it will take to feel like this is my home state just because the level of daily shock and intimidatingly impressed joy is so high. Its hard to be jaded or feel normal or yawn at all. I live in California!

 Today we went to a new beach, Muir Beach, after the redwoods....which we naturally adore. Its all filtered golden light and mossy quiet....well mostly, you know....except for my boys sometimes shrieking and screaming and beating each other with fallen sticks. It does quiet them though, that incredible cathedral grove. I am looking forward to playing hostess to friends and family who come out to visit and have never been to a redwood grove.

It was a day of lots of fresh air, all warm and bright. Pom took a nap in the sand and we chased crabs as big as our hands put together in and out of the waves, climbed up rocks and redwoods and split rail fences. I got my 10,000 steps in without even thinking about it and utterly shorted myself on protein and water.

We are going to love day tripping out into the whirling mass of beauty here, and I have a feeling we will meet friends out at incredible places and hike our heads off. Its a little tricky to figure out how to work A into our adventures because so many of these spots are overrun on weekends. We have to get smarter about packing breakfast picnics and laying clothes out the night before for Saturday morning outings and beat the rush! Of course, this requires more advance planning....like knowing what we plan to do for the weekend....before the weekend. This would imply actual planning and communication about intended targets and chores and free-space for weekend time on Thursday night or something. Hmmm....

 Well, we can always just go listen to more James Taylor and just go with the ridiculously overcrowded flow. Organization is not our strong suite as a couple. May it ever be a target and may we someday communicate and strategize like a siamese twin generals! Someday....

I also bought a pumpkin pie...because it is officially the second day of autumn and I was in a funk and did not feel like baking....also it was 90 degrees today because we are still having a bizarre heat wave. We ate the pie with our hands, on the beach, because I forgot the plastic knife in the van and did not want to hike back to get it. Pumpkin pie is surprisingly festive and manageable beach food! Pom suggested apple pie and I told him that before that happens we have to go to an apple orchard and pick some. Next on my list: field trips to a raw milk dairy farm and apple picking. I am wistfully imagining myself canning applesauce with the boys next week....you know, since my canning jars will be buried on that semi-truck that is arriving on Sunday. That makes sense, right? At least as much sense as eating pumpkin pie with your bare hands on the beach.

Reasons To Love November

This time of year is kind of one those in between stages....its getting cold and soon will be drab but we're not quite to the holidays. It starts to feel wintery but its not technically winter for weeks yet. Its a kind of a lull in the calendar...not much on the docket until Thanksgiving at the very end of the month. BUT, nothing is wasted....all things have meaning.

Why must we remember November? Let's delve.

Reasons Why November Is Fabulous:

1. It is stunning! Where I live, leaf color really only begins in October and every year the truly breathtaking color is this month....at least some of it is. We have incredible frosty mornings that make you shuffle into slippers and catch your breath and then blazing, golden afternoon with sunlight shooting through every window of the house and making the maple above the garage simply radiate.
2. Bulbs! I love my garden and I always think bulb planting is such fun. It feels special and happy but its easy and can be very cheap, depending on what you invest in. Even dollar stores sell bulbs in November. My boys all love when bulbs need planting because its such a simple thing that they can all help. 
3. Hot coffee, hot tea, roasts, pies, baked chicken, slow roasted beets.....its oven weather! Finally, I can cook all the things that I have been dreaming about all summer and it feels so wonderful to open the oven door to have a peek and have all that deliciously scented heat curl out at your face. 
4. Its Native Heritage Month. This is a hokey sounding official designation that became a little bit of a family tradition in our house after my friend Ashley started making a point to spend November looking into teaching more explicitly about native culture in her homeschool. The boys and I have so much fun learning about new tidbits, especially about the tribes that live and lived here in Connecticut. So many fascinating groups, traditions, crafts, songs, clothes and stories. This year, I am really hoping to get to the Mashanntucket Pequot Museum, which is up the coast from us and sounds amaaaaazing!
5. Its early holiday season but its feels like the legit holiday warm-up to me. I am scouting cookie recipes, thinking a little about gifts, making my birthday wishlist (I have a December birthday) and mulling over menu plans for big meals together with loved ones and friends. This is the fun part....before the crazy hits. 
6. Hiking season! This is my top, most favorite time of year for hiking. The weather is cool enough to not be sweaty on the trail but all the wildlife is out in full array, trying to get their larders and bellies packed before winter. And best of all...the horrible, terrifying, completely disgusting ticks that carry Lyme's Disease so rampantly around here....are hiding because the weather gets too chilly for them. YAY!!!!!!
7. Gratitude gets the spotlight. I love this new trend of conscious and specific gratitude and right now everyone is all trending on Facebook with their daily November thankful posts. Sure, sometimes its annoying that every goes trite, starting with their family and having food and clothes but I love the thought and the occasionally sparkling and sincere grateful clarity about specific things in the lives of those I love. I try to use my Instagram account for a goal of making at least one daily post about some thing I was grateful for that day....and this month...I feel invigorated. 'Tis the season!
8. Darker evenings. I know that its hard on my mood and everyone I know complains but I have to say that having a mug of evening tea or a fire in the fireplace with the velvet black in every window is 10 x's better than the bright summer night athmosphere. Also, getting four boys to actually sleep is soooooo much easier when it actually gets dark. I have to say, despite the fact that I am posting this at 1 in the morning....I'm totally ready for bed myself every night in the the post Daylight Savings time of year. Cozy. 
9. Its Interior Decorating season. This time of year always has me re-invigorated about my house, renovation, moving furniture to different spots and painting things. I've been outside all summer...I'm ready to feather my nest. My new obsession is the show, Rehab Addict, a Netflix available, old house refurbishing kind of a thing with a young, blonde, mama lead character who brings old homes back to life while juggling the Little League schedule. I love it.
10. New Linens. I try to replace some linens in the my house that need a little love every year in November. Most years I buy myself a new pillow (I like them nice and fluffy), its my personal indulgence. This year, I saved up and treated myself to a batch of new, white bath towels. November is a good month to snuggle down.