"She refused to be bored, chiefly because she wasn't boring." Zelda Fitzgerald

Friday, July 6, 2012

Motherhood Support

Listening to my sister-in-law, Jane, tell me about the excruciating woes of Motherhood in Times of Colic a lot lately. I sure remember so vividly the raw hours of floor pacing I did with a screaming Dee in my arms when he was a babe. This motherhood gig (as my father-in-law often says) is serious business! Whew. I hear so much complaining about the modern communication devices but personally, when those I love are far away and hard times are afoot, am so glad for phones, for texting, for email and for Facebook.

I remember one night when my mother was visiting, sitting downstairs in the living room, waiting for me while I tried and tried and tried to put the toddler to sleep in his own bed. I was upstairs in a rocker outside his bedroom door with my phone and my mom was downstairs at the computer. I would put the toddler in his bed and tell him good night and then retire to my rocker to cry and curse alternately outside the door and message my mom on my phone. My mom would type, "You can do it! You're a great mommy!" and then I'd pick up the escaping toddler as he tried to escape and put him back in his bed again etc. I think I made it through that evening solely on the iron-clad  messages my phone carried from my mom downstairs. Its kind of cool to be supporting Jane now via my own boosting messages. What goes around comes around, even in a good way!

Its interesting having the chance to watch my mother-in-law do it too. Good moms, regardless of our differences with them or variations in taste are there for their children, even from far away, even when they grow up. Just because we're legal voters and can drive our own minivans doesn't mean that we don't need that encouraging pat on the back now and then and encouragement to keep on, even when it seems too hard.

Gives me a touch more patience (if I stop and think of it) with my four year old's meltdowns over trying desperately to put his own shoes on. Sometimes we all need to be talked down from the edge and told that we manage, even with the small things.
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