The Rythmn of the Rails

There's something about trains. Little boys especially are obsessed with them thanks the bizarrely popular show about Thomas The Tank Engine coupled with the importance of the wonderful wooden train sets now so ubiquitous in toy collections. I was never a little boy, I never had a Brio train set and as a child I had never hear of Thomas and yet from my early childhood till now trains have been a  romantic notion.

We had a day trip recently, while Nana and Grandpa Alan were visiting to take in the Essex Steam Train and Riverboat in combination. I do recommend the outing if you get the chance. It is a bit expensive so it was a special splurge gift from the visiting grandfolks. If you are trying to trim costs, feel free to cut the riverboat section. It was nice to be out on the cool river on a blazing hot day (100 degrees at our house further south) but the actual boat itself didn't offer much in the way of a unique experience. I think you get the same feeling from any boating experience. The train is where its at.

When I was a little girl I remember being pretty impressed and swoony about the freight train that ran behind my grandparents house. Even though I didn't grow up anywhere near a rail I never found the sound of the train going by annoying or disturbing, it was all about romance. As an adult I found out that my maternal grandpa was a genuine boxcar jumping hobo for a while in his youth, riding the rails to California to seek his fortune. After that I always thought of him when I saw train tracks curving off into the distance. I still do.

The rides on the Essex Steam Train vibe exactly how you want a nostalgic souvenir train voyage to feel. They keep it short but long enough to feel real, they use original cars with original seats and decoration (albeit updated with modern lights and such) and the giant engine is painted black and belches smoke exactly like a painting. The boys were open-mouthed walking past it to board.

One of the things I love about train travel in general is the way you feel genteel and historic while partaking. Even Manhattan's modern trains run on rails and rock you rhythmically, and the conductor still walks through the cars taking tickets just the way that Laura Ingalls and Heidi describes. There's little something about rail travel that is so unchanged, so elementally the same as in "the olden days" that it seems completely possible that we could really be in Anna Karenina or The Orient Express.We ought to all carry valises and watch for our trunks at the station!

I love the surreal view out the window of an airplane at the Cloudland above it all but the running visual commentary out the window of a train is an integral part of the trip to wherever you're going. Trains take you past waterfalls and deep into canyons, smoothly through quaint town centers and along the sides of mountains. I don't think I'd ever nap well on a train or get any reading done....too much to see. And lots of it untouched by car travel or billboard advertisements.

When Nana and Grandpa Alan went home they left the boys a large box full of new wooden tracks and cars for their train set, so much so that a new giant box had to be purchased to house them all. I am not a toy collecting queen but I don't mind this one. Link those cars up boys and squint down the squiggle of tracks you're arranging on the living room rug....I'm all for dreaming in that direction!

wooden toy train bridge (Photo credit: uccemebug)

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Poetry Friday: Between The Seasons

Happy Poetry Friday!

This photo isn't sunrise (like I wrote about in today's poem) it's sunset but it is April and it captures the warm, glowing feel I'm missing in our current season. Am totally jumping the gun mentally at the moment and living one month hence. Spring, you can not come fast enough...I am so ready.

That said, today's poem comes out of a deep, little corner of my self that knows that all things exist for a reason and all bits of creation have purpose and beauty and innate use, even early March. This afternoon Ru said to me, with this sweet, open face: "Mommy? What are leaches good for?" And then there was a long mommy-pause. Leaches are one of the very few animals that I deeply detest. But I want him to appreciate and value all of creation, not just the glamorous members like the nautilus and the zebra. So, yeah...even the lowly leach has a purpose and a value, and it's good at something...something I have yet to discover. I told Ru we'll head right to Wikepedia when I get the chance and read about them to see what they are good at because I just didn't know. And I will force myself to pay attention to the beauty of the now, even if now is frigid March. What exactly is March good at?

A Missed Interlude

The light had a way of crescendo-ing
April daybreak so that she realized
The dismissed tinkle of last month's
Icicles had been a kind of prelude.



In the meantime, to help the chill weather time pass faster, we have company for the weekend! I will be writerly absent tomorrow and Sunday but will rejoin you all on Monday, tuned up with fresh ideas, inspiration, conversation and laughter. Concentrated time with friends is good for my blog, no two ways about it.

And now, I'm off to make up the guest bed! Hop yourself on over to The Small Noun, a first-time Poetry Friday host, to find other participants, posting their poetic thoughts today.

Sweet Baby Nib

Sometimes, I can't believe how sweet Nib is. Heaven knows I love all my boys very dearly but there is just something so easy and uniquely sweet about him at this stage in particular.

He has learned pointing and it is his new hot trick. He points at everything, one dainty finger pinging out into space, clearly aware that it's an impressive trick. He also shakes his head no wildly now. I think he's the youngest of my children to learn to do that. Not that he understands what it means...I'm pretty sure he has no idea, honestly. But still...there he is, shaking his head wildly all the time: "No no nonono!"

He looks to see if I see him when he's about to cruise down the sofa or free-stand for a second. He loves books will come climb in my lap if I sit down to read the big boys a story and gravitates towards any storybooks he sees on the floor. He comes over to get hugs and give snuggles at all times of day, just because he suddenly thought of it. He lights up light a Christmas tree whenever I walk in the room and grins at me. He says "Dada" as clear as day and he's madly in love with my canned peaches.


Have you got a sweet someone at your house that you love at this moment in time for special small reasons? List 'em out. Why are you madly in love with them...at this specific point in history?

Poetry Friday: A Noun List

Today I am sharing a poem I wrote five years ago...the year I was 25. This poem is sort of a word game I challenged myself to. I decided to have a go at writing something personal and slightly vulnerable that included the top 25 most common nouns in the English language. All the nouns are in capitals.

I've included a few shots of my circa 2005-6 for your enjoyment, give you a little image in your mind of the "me" that is speaking.

My Uncommon Experience

I have found my PLACE in the spiral of TIME
My niche between WOMAN and CHILD
I am hovering in this 25th YEAR
Breathing in my fully fragrant LIFE
I savor the WAY I fit snugly with this MAN,
Our love a snapping, tender THING
But just broken-in enough to leave a
PERSON feeling warmed at the sight of us.
I cherish the pizzazz of youth under the
GOVERNMENT of a new womanly knowledge.
I love this DAY when I cup them both in my HAND.
And, I am pausing here, at this comfortable POINT,
Young enough to still have a robust NUMBER of elders
But old enough to have developed a mothering EYE,
Respect, keeping COMPANY with
A cozy amount of irresponsibility.
I am suspending animation for just this WEEK,
Just long enough to WORK this GROUP of moments
Into that fat CASE of files marked “Great Feelings,”
I will chew slowly, nourished on the delicacy
That is this minute PART of my life in the
WORLD distilled into a fleeting seasonal dish.
The great PROBLEM is: The FACT of Time's moving on.

If you would like to see more Poetry Friday participant posts, head on over to Random Noodling for the full list.

Art Peek

So, have I ever told you all how very, very important I think it is for mommies to have alone time, time with good friends, time with people who inspire, time to create something of beauty, time away from their dear little ones. Of course, there's nothing so very particular to mommyhood that means a given woman or human being for that matter, needs these things except for the fact that motherhood somehow carries with it the suggestion of martyrdom. A good mommy is a doormat for her husband her children...she pushes her needs deep, deep down to her toes and pours herself out for those she loves. While on some level this does just happen, and on some level its even good and to be admired and suggested....on another level it is kind of sick and insidious. And I assert that mommies who are having these deep human needs for specific kinds of "time" in their lives are able to be better mommies for it.

As you all know, my own personal time at the moment is my art group that I'm painting with once a week. I cannot even tell you how helpful, wholesome, healing, and fabulously empowering this new thing has been for me. Some weeks I feel like the only truly worthwhile thing I got done was painting at my group. That I came away with my soul a few notches fuller and I know that there are countless Tuesdays now when I've left with more stamina, resources and bounce in my step as a mother to boot.

One of my artist friends, a fellow mommy who first invited be to be a part of the art group, recently quipped:

  "I am fortunate, there is no doubt.  I don't have to make money at art right now, yet I have to make art, I simply have to.  I make time to make art.  I think a widespread obsession with raising kids well is not such a bad thing.  However, to raise healthy children it's important NOT to obsess about their every moment; growing up for any person means learning that the universe does not revolve around oneself. I believe it's better for my kids to come along on my adventures than to BE my adventure.  I rather think my children benefit from knowing that I have a creative life that is nearly as much a priority as they are.  It is good for a child, or anyone really, to learn about delayed gratification!  That is why I don't feel guilty for saying, 'Love, I will get you more juice in ten more minutes, once I have gotten this bit just the way I want it.'"

Yes. Yes. Yes. That...is what I mean.

All that to say, find a way to feed your deepest you, even if (or maybe even especially if) you're a mommy. And if you're curious about my group...here's a tiny peek at today.

Tornado Alley

This is sort of how life feels a the moment at our house. One big, not terribly colorful, baby-in-the-picture-now blur. Kind of insane really. I have wayyy to many things to get done in one day and every single day ends lately with me panting madly and trying to find a way to shut of the manic "Concerns List" chattering in my head so that I can get to sleep.

• Our landlord wants to bring a realtor through to evaluate our unit for listing and I am trying not to completely lose my mind over the impossibility that will be getting the place clean enough that I won't just die on the spot when they arrive. 
• I am struggling just to get laundry washed and all the dishes cleaned, I still am not really "cooking" at all. (Its true...I am able to make jam but not dinner) My kind friends at MOPS are bringing in our evening meal every other night and we're eating leftovers for lunch and the alternate dinners and breakfast is something clever like....yogurt...or you know, yogurt.
• I finally got the flannel sheets from the last cold spell off of Ru's bed today and I have not mailed even one thank you note. 
• I was really hoping this house deal would come together before our summer house guests but, it looks like it won't be happening and I'm wracking my brain about where we'll put them all.
• New discipline issues are cropping up with the big brothers and I'm resorting to online problem solving research to come up with fresh ideas for confronting the problems.
• The birth announcements are all printed up and gathering dust on top of the computer. Blast! Must mail somehow!
• The van needs to have a taillight replaced and I can't figure out when I'll have time to get it into the shop.
• I have tomato plants in teeny tiny little peat pots on my back stoop that need somewhere real to live and I'm vacillating daily about whether to put them in the ground or shell out the extra cash for big pots and potting soil on the off chance that we end up moving before they bear.
• The baby has the worst case of baby acne on the planet. He looks truly frightening. I am so sick of explaining to people that he hasn't been bitten by lots of bugs or broken out in a terrifying heat rash or gotten some devastating sickness. And I was hoping to do his one month portraits soon but, he truly looks so awful that I don't want to remember it in pictures. I'm even considering taking him in to the pediatrician. Would they laugh me out of the room?
• I am that horrible in between stage physically. I can't fit my normal clothes but, I refuse to wear a maternity wardrobe and I'm not past the six week window to the magical place where dieting is allowed. Blast. 

How to avoid drowning in self pity, panic or total dark pessimism? Its really not that bad, right? Tell me this is somehow all petty or all in my head.

Romantic Stargazing

Tonight A took me out for a date I forgot we even had scheduled, a night at the local astronomical observatory together. I sure did think of my brother-in-law, Doubleddog's husband, who is quite the night sky nut. I know he would have loved to be there with us, peeking through that giant telescope at all the twinkles in the dark.

It was a great date. Never mind that I forgot entirely about our plans and never did pack the  goods the boys needed (pajamas, toys, snacks, diapers for nighttime) for the drop-off at their sitters and who really cared that it totally slipped my mind to remember to make us a picnic dinner so that we wouldn't starve. We happened on a super cute little taqueria and had amazing tacos de bistec and camerones and all regrets vanished. Too bad the lengue was still in the pressure cooker and wasn't available for tacos yet. We'll have to go back.

At the observatory we were instructed carefully which eye-piece to look through and told that touching the telescope in any way was absolutely verbotten. Hazard of working with very sensative instruments, I guess. This super cute grandpa astronomer was manning scope tonight and walked us through peeking at Mars, Saturn (cool view of the rings tonight along with four of its moons!) and one pair of twin stars. Never really heard of twin stars before (stars that orbit each other quite closely) and wouldn't have ever known it was Mars I was seeing without being told so but, Saturn was stinking cool and pretty obvious. It looked like a cocktail olive...skewered by its rings, running straight up and down tonight and then the glittering sprinkle of its four moons on either end of the toothpick. Grandpa Astronomer told us that the brightest glitter speck was Titan.

L

Love the last line of this note by the observatory doorbell.

After we enjoyed the scope and chatted for a bit, we went out on the observatory deck and sat back in the warm spring air to gaze at the mixture of plane lights from La Guardia and stars. We can see more stars here than I thought and I even managed to find the Big Dipper. (Don't laugh....I stink at finding constellations and can normally only locate Orion and the Pleiades) Good fun to mix it up a little and try paying attention to a different part of nature that we normally don't spend a lot of time on as a couple. I'm pretty Earth focused and macro focused even within earthbound nature experience but, its good to remember that there's a lot more out there still.

The Bookworm's Attack

Had a little drop-by visit from our cooking pal, Protege this morning for a cozy sort of catch-up and then a good dose of more sunshine, yard romping and eventually, lots of wonderful cooking such as blossoms from such inspiration.

While I was cooking and we were visiting, Protege started thumbing through my cookbook stacks and fingering pages and asking me about my favorite culinary tomes. I ticked off all my favorite, favorites on my fingers and then wandered off into, "But...I also really like...." And she laughed at my salivary tone and my endless list. Books are a hard topic to get me to limit and can be a bit of Rabbit-Trail-Central as one book or topic naturally leads in my mind to another and pretty soon I'm worming my way from my favorite books on bread-making to child psychology and then juvie lit classics. In short, I like to read. A lot.

I've had lots of people ask me how I read. And its a good question. Lots of people just aren't readers or they think of reading as vacation past-time or a thing they liked to do for fun when they were in their teens but, they can't imagine how it fits into adult life, let alone motherhood. Well, there are ways.

Some of what I've had to do in order to stay an avid reader is adaptive and some of it is pure luck and some is even modern technology...every little bit helps. But, I really think that if you want to be/stay/become a reader...you can...no matter how old you are or how busy you are.

Here's how it works for me:

When I become a wife and then really when I became a mom I became a fragmented reader. This sounds like a bad thing but for me its a matter of survival as a book lover. I read several books at once and I read small snatches here and there. The old days of sitting numbly with a book, turning page after page until the words swim and your eyes sting are pretty much gone for me at the moment. (Much as I did love those days!)

Lately, I have a book stationed pretty much anywhere around the house where I might find myself with a few minutes to kill: at my bedside, next to the rocking chair in the boys room, on the kitchen counter, in the car, next to the living armchair, and even occasionally (don't tell!) in the bathroom. I read whatever book is handy wherever I am when I have a moment or two. Sometimes I only get through a page but, its progress! And with so many books on the boil I am always close to finishing and just starting something which makes me feel ever progressive.

Common times in my day-to-day life when I find I can work in a snatch of reading include:

• Nap times...the part where I am waiting for the boys to actually go to sleep (at the moment I sit in the room with them because they will actually go to sleep if I sit there and supervise and verbally remind them to lay down and not talk and close eyes...etc.). It helps them go to sleep more quickly if I am not available for chatting but, just "there" enough to make sure they know they are supervised, a book is my technique for creating this distance. 

• I read during little moments of downtime in the kitchen...waiting for the 2 more minutes I put on the timer because the bread wasn't quite done, while the spinach wilts in a pan, while I wait for the potato water to boil, while the oil heats for sauteing, etc. etc...there are no end of mini-waiting moments in the kitchen. (Just as an aside, often the reading that happens during little kitchen breaks is storybook reading because the boys are often eagerly underfoot hoping for a little attention....and that's good reading too but, sometimes they're happily flipping through a book alone or busy in the living room with blocks and then I'm flipping pages on my own.)

• I often read while A gets ready for bed. I am a simple wash and wear kind of girl...brush my teeth and braid my hair (and often I get my tooth-brushing down while A is putting the boys to bed) so then its just throwing on my pajamas and braiding my hair while A has to take his contacts out, brush, floss, wash his face, apply lip balm, rub in his special hand lotion...etc. etc. So, I huddle under the covers and read, read, read while I wait for him. Sometimes this reading is done out loud because we're reading something together (which means I read it aloud to both of us with occasional pauses for discussion). 

• Nursing. Nursing is reading gold. I am not currently nursing anybody so this reading window is gone from my life at the moment but, it'll be back in just a couple months and boy do I look forward to snuggling/nursing/book time. I always have had a pretty easy time nursing (remember what I said about an element of luck?) and so, I am hands free or at least one hand free while the baby tanks up so, I read! I find that I am less impatient with the baby eating at his/her leisure and taking their sweet time if I have some wonderful book in my hands. I get a lot more reading done when I have a tiny new one at my house (as antithetical as that sounds).

• Various forms of car down-time are good reading time for me...the boys are napping, we're driving through Ohio on a roadtrip and A is on the phone with his brother....so, I read. Another common variation is while I'm waiting for an oil change to be completed or while we're sitting in the mechanic's office for repairs. A and I always read together whenever we're on a road-trip too...we pick out a book we'd both like to tackle and I read aloud while he drives...not straight, there's time for conversation or music listening or just looking out the window too but, it helps us stay awake during the drowsy afternoon hours or when we're pushing an after dark deadline and trying to make sure we don't fall asleep.

• I read while I'm on hold on the phone, when I'm in the doctor's waiting room, while the boys play at the park and when we're waiting for A at the train station....in short...I read a lot but, in snatches. I'm just a total opportunist...I grab my snatches whenever and wherever I can. 

One more small bit that falls into the "just lucky" category is that I'm a very fast reader. It helps me whip through books in 2-10 minutes snatches when I can buzz off a few pages in no time flat. I'm not sure how I learned to read quickly but, I can tell you its random chance as far I know...I've never taken a speed reading course, I didn't work to improve my words-per-minute-count and I've never had any kind of instruction in the craft. It just kind of happened to me.

That fact aside, I really do think that anyone can work reading into their life. All of us have these little moments and if reading isn't as important to you as it is to me perhaps you might wish to only devote one small window of your day to reading, say just when you're putting your kids down for a nap...even that little bit will eventually be the way to chisel your way through more words, stories, knowledge and adventure than you're consuming now. More is always more!

So, that's the long and short of how I make it work. I also enjoy other things in those little windows of downtime occasionally (music, radio, internet and phone calls) and once in a while we go on vacation and I spend solidly, leisurely afternoons reading on the couch in the sunshine while the boys sleep. But, the real day-to-day how of my reading is above, its not about excessive or tricks of the eye, its just bite-sized bits wherever I can catch them.

Other little reading bits I love:

GoodReads...you can see the list of my latest conquests I've recorded on this site in the sidebar column on the left and click on over if you're curious enough to read my reviews. I use this site to keep track of what I've read, when I read it and what I thought of the material. *grateful nod to Jane here for her leading me to the site*

Amazon....Ah Amazon, Amazon...where would book lovers like me be without you! I use Amazon all the time. I look up books, authors or topics I'm hearing about or otherwise interested in and avidly read the gobs of reviews the site provides to vet my potential reading list additions. My reading wishlist is full of the things I'm hoping to read or buy soon. Feel free to take a gander if you're curious. (Be warned, its crazy long!)

Alibris is a great place to go for those obscure books that are out-of-print and hard to find today...the kind of stuff your Grandma had that you always wished you had a copy of yourself. Very handy for people who like old stuff. (ahem)

Bookmooch is a great site where you can swap books you have that you don't want for books other people have that they don't want....everyone posts their wishlists and the system lets you know if somebody has one of your wishes available for claiming...all you're out is shipping. Pretty cool.

And one of my favorite online reader tools is my local library's website...I can check my due dates, renew online, browse the catalog (with my Amazon list in the next tab for handy reference) and my most favorite of all...I can request books they don't have through inter-library loan. I was a grown-up before I learned about inter-library loans and it rocked my world. Basically, the idea is that any book your local library doesn't have they'll search through the library network in your whole state and see if somebody else has it (the answer is almost always by the time you search that many databases) and then they'll put in a request at that library to have it sent to your local branch for you to pick up and take home. So lovely of them!

And that folks...is how I read. May you do the same.