Making It Together

Am immersed in reading the impossibly good Daring Greatly. Life-changing philosophy, psychology and research on vulnerability, trust, human connection and overcoming shame. Brene Brown is officially on my list of most inspiring humans. Love it when brilliance becomes a best seller and shows up at every library everywhere. It's can't-put-it-down, divinely inspired, putting-in-missing-pieces-I've-been-puzzled-over-forever....type of good.


This morning I noticed that the snowdrops are blooming at the back door and the daffodils at the front door are showing healthy green shoots too. The grocery stores are selling dollar bundles of daffodils for a fix to tide us all over. I am super fixing my faith on the return of warm and leaning it mentally. Not much longer now. We are all going to make it.

We have made two expeditions to the beach this week. Somehow just sifting sand in our fingers and collecting shells together is enough of a recollection of summer and our recent trip to help hold us.

Came home this time with a collection of purple quahog bits, the parts that the local tribes used for money, storytelling, rank and all kinds of other signifiers. Amazing to finger these bits of shell smashed by seagulls and imagine people from another time gathering and trimming them to add beauty and value to their long ago lives too. We are all marching along together in this world, looking for beauty, holding on through the winters of our lives and standing shoulder to shoulder with historical and real-time peoples....a countless line of folks who making meaning together.




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A Little Sand In Our Shoes

We took the afternoon off and headed to the beach. A little sand in the shoes, a little saltwater behind the ears, a little wind in the hair, just the ticket. I am still so new at identifying all the little things we find at the shore. I think I know more than last year but never enough. So many little glinting mysteries in the sand. So glad to watch the boys pawing around on the edge of the sea just as curious as I am and never ready to leave.

Impromtu Beach Stop

 Mama saw a taco truck. Mama pulled over. Mama told the boys to put on their bathing suits. Mama bought some tacos. The Beach + A Taco Truck??? Crazy cool.

 There's a lot of sea lettuce on the shore right now at this particular spot, and so you had to find a clear spot or wade tip-toe through it to get to the open water. Love that my boys aren't to prissy to handle it.

 You can see why it got the name it did. I hear it's edible. I've never tried. I don't actually personally like sea veggies unless they're on the outside of my sushi.....at least as far as I have tried.

 Isn't this red kind pretty? Anybody know their seaweeds? I need to learn their names.

 There was a little wading, which became a little splashing, and a few falls...no harm done. Just slightly more damp  on the ride home. We don't mind a little sea water.

Found a lot of scallop shells at this beach right now too....interesting to see how the natural detritus changes over the season and location to location. We don't have many scallop shells near our house, we have whelks (Look! I know a new one!) and lots of oysters and mussels.

We sat and ate our tacos, watched the freighters unloading across the harbor, launched a few driftwood ships and then hopped back across the sand to our car. First impromptu beach session of the year? Check!

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Autumnal Beach Explore

We took a little picnic lunch down to the shore that is a stone's throw from our house and had what I was calling at first the "Last Beach Outing of the Year." Heh. What was I thinking? It was gorgeous. Not super sunny and not over warm (high fifties) but there was no real wind and it was warm enough to be quite comfortable in our light jackets.

We explored a new beach we'd never been to (fun to learn our new neighborhood a little more), ate peanut butter in jelly in a hurried way and then spent a long time exploring the edge of the tide. So much wonderful stuff had washed up...oyster shells by the pound, pearly, purple mussel shells, claws from crabs, bits of horseshoe crab shell, and all kinds of fabulous sea weed.

Anyhow, all that to say that it was a great way to celebrate the baby turning five months old and it will in no way be our last outing of the fall.

I can't wait to go back! I forget how wonderful it is to just wander around bent backed, looking at all the ocean detritus that has rolled in and watch the boys chase seagulls and drive away with the scent of salt water rubbing off your hands onto the steering wheel.

Yay for living by the sea!

So Far This Week....

We've had our first local sweet corn. Its been ripe before now but, I just finally got a chance to pick up an armful and haul it home to douse with butter and salt. YUM. It was really, really good. Am contemplating making some corn chowder in the near future. What else do you do with fresh sweet corn besides eat it on the cob in volumes? I'd love to hear your ideas.

We watched Nib coo and gurgle and chortled together over his increasingly charming almost giggle. He is so close people...so close! Argh! He's an incredible little morning bird. Wakes up full of little wet and cheery things to say, all wreathed in smiles. He's a darling dear. No other word. We continue to be amazed at his ability to sleep at night. I am a fervent co-sleeper but, with this baby I really haven't because he wakes up once a night and seems to prefer his own private slumber in a little basket on the floor next to our bed. Quite incredible. I am very astonished at this phenomenon and have never really seen anything like it before although of course you read of such urban legends in books. (I thought they were lies, all lies!) We are having far more trouble at nighttime with his big brother Dee. I guess they don't call it terrible two for nothing.

Also, there was baking. I realize I am supposed to be savoring the chilly last bits of my air conditioned existence before moving into a big house with no cooling mechanism of any kids BUT...I can't go on a very long baking fast. I love to bake. So, I fell prey to a dreamy sounding recipe for pound cake...a classic that I had never made (Can you believe it?). And it was just okay. I'm not wild about pound cake I guess, I'm all give or take about it after the experience and a little reflection. Yes..but LOOK!!!! Isn't that beautiful? That was my very favorite part of the whole event, right there...that beautiful creamy, smooth, angel wing batter. Mmmmmm......stunning, no? 

And we had a date this week! Its been an age. We're budgeting out money and trying to be careful not to spend any more than we have to (house down payment) and one of the things that took a serious cut for a while was our babysitter money. That meant no dates for a while which was kind of hard to swallow but, oh it felt good to go out again. We just paid for the sitter, no dinner, no movie...we went for a walk on the foggy seashore instead which fit my romance bill. Yay New England!

Beach Trust

On my mind today are trust, safety and neighborliness. Most strangers are normal human beings...they're you and me and our friends and relatives. Most people who talk to us or approach us aren't dangerous and are perfectly trustworthy. There are of course the random few who are devious, unreliable or even terrifying. This is reality. That said, it is my opinion that those people are:

A.) very rare
B.) usually very spottable

I'm of the old mindset that says you should smile at strangers, wave to people if they let you cut in traffic and make friendly small talk with the other people in line at the bank. I don't teach my children that they aren't to talk to strangers, I teach them that when the nice grandpa ahead of us in line at the check-out says that he "Likes those red shoes young man!" you should dimple a grin and tell him politely, "Thank you very much! I like your tie!" I think if we just trust the people around us we'll buy goodwill for ourselves, show the love of Christ (He did say that love would be the magic mark of His followers) have more fun waiting in lines and sometimes other people will help us when we need it most.

Reid meets the sea 

 

I still teach my sons of course that they shouldn't take candy apples from strange women with warts on their noses, they shouldn't get into cars with random men with green skin and there is to be no signing up for a lifetime supply of iPod just because a really fast talking young fellow with a big grin suggested such when we were down in Times Square. Don't worry. But, I'm trying to avoid the philosophy of stranger danger and instead preach love for fellow man and that we should know and understand our neighbors...even if they're just our neighbors for an hour in the next booth at a restaurant.

Mostly, this sort of courtesy is warmly received by the public but almost never do I hear similar ideas proposed by other mothers. Moms today...yea people in general are terrified of everyone in the world that they do not know. I think this is such a crying shame. But, I do have to share that I have noticed two things that have given me hope.

1. This woman....and the parenting movement she spawned.
2. Beach Trust

Everybody locks their houses up like crazy and people lock their cars, password their computers and have secret codes for everything under the sun but the one place where people still trust each other? The beach. Have you ever noticed that at the beach people leave all of their belongings sitting there in bags and run off like silly kids to splash in the water?

 Unattended beach goods at the Rhode Island shore this past weekend

They drop their towels on the beach blanket, leave behind the sunglasses they love, glinting on the top of their beach tote and go off for a half hour stroll down the shore, far out of sight of their goods. This is a fabulous thing that always makes me tremendously happy to encounter.

 Our own unattended beach goods!

I've never witnessed a beach robbery although I'm sure once in a blue moon it happens but I have seen perfect strangers haul a strolling families worldly goods up out of the range of the encroaching high tide or seen a woman chasing an absent swimmer's hat down the beach after it blew away. I love to see that. I love to be part of it. I love that something about the beach has allowed us to let go in some real, deep way and love and rely on the people around us.

Not just when the beach population is like this:

But even when it looks like this:

More love man, more love.