I love the green, lush coating of Virginia creeper on the stone wall here. It's the front lawn of the Catholic church around the corner. I have a thing for Catholic churches....so old and mysterious, weighted with solemn dignity. I am also intimidated by them though, which is why I walk past, have even prowled the grounds of this church but have never satisfied my longing to inside. They are beautiful but they feel exclusive, exotic and special but also set-apart and purposely exclusive. I do mean to actually go in. I want to slip in sometime and pray in the light slanting down from the stained glass windows, light a candle and genuflect at the beautiful altar. It's a kind of introverted Mommy fantasy of mine, private prayer in the small cathedral around the corner.

Hot Links

Sharing a list of wonderful inspiring brain detritus

Image by fabbio via Flickr

Links, links, everywhere!

today. All kinds of stuff that's been tumbling about in my head ever since I saw it, making me smile and think by turns.

• Love John Muir. Love this photo of him. Love the quote below him. (note to self: read a book about his life at some point)
• Speaking of photos of famous men, how's about this provocative shot of Sitting Bull, in full body form, eh?
• I love the idea of wooden toothbrushes. They make me smile.
• These peas sound stunning...gold pods with purple blossoms! Next year, peeps...it's on my seed list. Didn't even get peas in the ground this year.
• Am contemplating my need level for a diy set of glowing garden orbs. It somehow seems like a good idea. DIY geniuses are such raw inspiration.
• Kiwi makes me happy! These little kiwi boats make me hurt, because they make me so happy. I think I need to have a summer party just so we can eat some.
• Milk + Ink makes for breathtaking, soft beauty. Who knew!?!
• Am planning to make time in my schedule to go and see this church, post-haste! I couldn't believe such an undiscovered ecclesiastical art gem was right here in my area.

Happy link hopping! Sometimes it's good to skip the descriptives and just share the raw material that's dumping into our brains. Got any links for me?

Pictoral Easter

Easter was lovely. The weather has been creeping along, painfully towards spring in centimeters but suddenly yesterday the sun was beaming all over the place, flowers opened in flocks and out of nowhere all the lawns were green and every tree seems to show tips of chartreuse. Amazing how the season can change on a dime. I feel like we have come, quite overnight, into spring for good. Boy is it nice to see it! I was so ready it was making me get a charley horse.

It was the perfect weather for a holiday. I had little baskets full of goodies for the boys, and more candy than I think I ever want to hand out again (note to self for next year)....and layers of evil, fancy clothes to trap my little men into wearing. I wish I had a picture of all of us in our Eastery outfits but unfortunately, I didn't get a good shot. The camera sometimes is not on my arm. :)

Our congregation hosted a beautiful Easter service, packed to the brim with eager parishioners, very vibrant with joy over the resurrection and the promise of life and the deep love of God. I love the times when a church service has moments that feel like you get in a stadium as everyone watches "our team" go for the touchdown; that unity and energy. I was also very proud of the boys for keeping all their ties on through the whole service. After the service finished we hustled the kids out to the car and jetted to my aunt's house for a really beyond delicious holiday meal and a little festive egg hunting.

A and I come from two different traditions regarding Easter gifts for children. He maintains that all treats should be hidden and found in the egg hunt along with the eggs that the children dyed. I was raised with the tradition of Easter baskets that were waiting on the breakfast table when we came down in the morning and then a little bit of candy and some plastic eggs that were used for a much less important Easter egg hunt held later in the day. We are still trying to figure out how to meld our two experiences into a pleasant something for our kids without going to over the top that everyone is sick of celebration or either of the two of us has their personal traditions tromped over and thrown out. Tricky business, all this negotiation. What does your family do for Easter treats for little ones?

Cinnamon Uplift

Little ears are suffering at our house. First Nib had a double ear infection and then Dee got the same bug. It's all coughing, snuffling, gasping and then head-splitting nocturnal wailing around the clock these days. The thing I hate the most is the unsettlingly drawn-out fever that just burns perpetually with this illness. Nib was all flushed and sweaty and now he's over that stage and Dee is the one with the pink cheeks and the glazed eyes. He's finally over the stage where he lays draped over the arm of the couch either unconscious or moaning all day long. We are on the upswing. I thought maybe he would be pretty normal + a cough this morning and we'd be back to normal operations but instead I felt like I was waking a steamed lobster when I kissed him good morning on his forehead.

And that is how we came to be home, making cinnamon rolls in the kitchen sunshine instead of attending church. I was so sad to stay home but there are few more potent balms for soothing ear infections or wounded mommy spirits than home baked sweet rolls.

I think I'll be okay now.

All Hallows Eve

Well, costume construction is in full swing and we are all stocked up (I hope!) on candy to hand out. I hear we live in a whiz bang neighborhood for Halloween celebration and so we're hoping we don't run out of sweets on our first run.

The boys waffled and wiffled about what they wanted to be. Ru was stuck on being a ghost for a while, (more on that in a bit) and then then he was thinking about Spiderman and then he decided once and for all the a fireman was the thing. Dee talked about Batman at first and then began insisting that he was going to be a doctor "in pink" whatever that may mean. Ru corrected him all the time, "You mean a nurse. They wear pink. Do you want to be a nurse? Is that what you mean?" (Which I thought was hilarious...not pink is for girls but, pink means a nurse. Kids are a riot. I love child logic.) And Dee would reply confidently, "Nope. A doctor. In pink." So, I was all set to dress him in pink scrubs and a white lab coat and then suddenly he decided that he wanted to be a fireman too. Ru thinks its great fun to be twin heroes and we have had more new declarations so today the supplies were purchased and assembly began. Firemen it is.

About that ghost business. I wasn't sure what to do with the whole ghost bit. I grew up in a family which forbade dressing as anything remotely mystical or devious so a ghost would have been out of the question while A's family was all for the creepy and the scary as that was somehow part of the night. I think two things give me pause,

1.) I have a hard time personally enjoying "dark" characters and decorations. I am pretty black and white and scary is icky and happy is good...and I'm not very able to enjoy the creepy or the foul.

2.) Really. I have very small children, one of whom is already up EVERY SINGLE NIGHT with nightmares. Do I need anymore darkness in his life? I'll pass.

So, I'm not sure exactly what to do with the whole topic ultimately. In some ways I think that forbidding my children to ever take part in anything that isn't puppies and rainbows, all innocent sweetness all the time is a bit strange. Life is dark and light, scary and hopeful...death is real, bad guys happen....etc. That said, I'm not sure I want my little boy dressing up as the ghoul either. It somehow really unsettles me. I really would love to think this whole topic through more thoroughly and think I'll try, (Anyone for a good verbal hash-out on the subject sometime? I'd love to try to tease out the issues involved.) but until then, with the limited mommy brain cells I have available and the short amount of time left until the holiday itself I decided to tell Ru that maybe I'll change my mind at some point and I'd love to keep talking about it, but at this point I wasn't willing to make any scary or icky costumes. Only good guys allowed.

The other piece of the holiday that I feel bears some weight and should be addressed is the church holiday business. I know that our Reformed brothers and sisters celebrate Reformation Day at this time of year and I've heard of families posting Luther's 95 Theses on the front door as a thought provoking reminder. In our church this is the time that we celebrate All Saints Day...a time to remember those who have gone before us and to bear in mind what a great historical tradition we are part of. In some parts of the world celebrants spend special time remembering their family members who are dead and gone and/or beautifying the family plot in the cemetery. I just love this photo from Poland, via Wikipedia...all candlelit beauty. So peaceful and warm, not how you usually picture a cemetery at all. We don't have any family members who were buried here, but we can light some candles here in our home, maybe on the porch and of course certainly in our pumpkins. And I plan to print out and hang a symbolic picture of Christ and the saints and talk together with the boys about those who have gone on before us.

While I mused, I enjoyed reading the following two articles on the topic of Christianity and Halloween. The first, from a pretty mainstream believer, talking about how important it is to seize the chance to interact with our neighbors in a loving way. I love that and also the notion that the whole country plays dress up together for one night. Those are both lovely things. The second article is from a Greek Orthodox believer who talks about the origins of the holiday and the oft recited notion that it has sinister Celtic roots. I always love debunking and I also appreciated hearing his ideas on honoring the saints and interacting with neighborhood children on the topic.

Paint on My Fingers

Had a great time at the art group I attend weekly today. Enjoyed blasting my way through another painting and am starting to really feel like I'm beginning to "get it" a little. The ladies there are so extremely encouraging. I have never been part of a group of professional-something-or-other-doers that was so welcoming, flattering and uplifting. I can't wait to go again next week.

 My favorite watercolor I've done so far, last week's creation.

This is the house I grew up in that my Papa built himself.

Our church is going to have an art show full of member's work (submissions in by June 6) and I'm kind of thinking of entering. I've never put anything in an art show before so, this is very exciting and also intimidating. Everything in me wants to wail, "But, I'm not an artist!!! I don't know anything about that kind of stuff, heavens!" but, I'm trying to pretend I am an artist so I'm trying to not listen and working on imagining myself getting a piece ready instead.

The work must be framed (something I've never done) and named, (something I totally stink at) so that will be interesting. One of the genuine artists in my group told me today that she could teach me how to frame something if I bought an appropriate frame at the local art supply shop and brought along a matting. I am hoping to be able to twist her arm into really doing it. It'd be good to learn and I am hopeful that it would be fabulously encouraging to boot, seeing something I painted all glossy and shining under glass.

The same kind woman lent me some watercolor pencils to try alongside my paints. They're basically colored pencils that smear and run like watercolors when you paint over them with water. Some of the colors run better than others and some of them change values when they are wet which makes them very interesting to play with. I had a lot of fun working with them today. I made this painting.

 My lightest colored work yet...still-life of tomatoes on the counter, mostly green.

I might buy a set for myself to play with. I find that I end up quite detail/realism obsessed in my painting which makes the tiny work tricky to pull off well with a brush. The pencils help there quite a bit. I am also considering getting some masking fluid as I have heard that can help with the slightly out of control way that watercolors can run and bleed into other areas. Making "white" parts of the painting is rather difficult otherwise. Am wondering if I should aquire some professional style watercolor paints too while I'm at the art supply store. I am actually painting with my sons paintboxes. I feel a little bad to be using up their paints and also wonder if I might get richer, clearer colors from higher quality paints. Might do some reading about how much benefit you get from going up class with certain supplies.

My watercolor benefactress has also offered to lend me books and videos on watercolor technique so I might be reading about art next! I do love to read so it would be a natural step. We don't have a video player that could play her vhs tapes but I could sneak off from moment to moment to a friend's house or the church to use a borrowed player I imagine. I am finding it hard to stop this painting business. I'm getting all addicted.

The Season of Lent

Lent begins today. We started the morning with an early morning Ash Wednesday service at church with a small group of friends and then the boys and I came home to talk it all over together through the rest of the morning. We talked about how Lent is a time like Advent when you look forward to an exciting new holiday and when you try to remember some special principles (Advent: hope, expectation, promise....Lent: how life can come from death, how loss and letting go can be good, self discipline) and we refreshed them on the story of Jesus life, death and resurrection.

At naptime we read the first story in one of their children's Bibles after the visitation of the three kings. We'll keep reading the life of Jesus through Advent until we reach the story of Easter itself.

Then we took a little break from all the chatter to dye a tablecloth to use on our dining room table during the Lenten season. The seasonal color of Lent is a deep purple, symbolic of royal dignity, solemnity and penance so, we took a white tablecloth and together the boys stirred it in the sink until it was a deep grapey shade. So pretty. They both had a lot of fun and we have a new decoration to remind us of the time of year we're going through.

I always try to give up something or things for Lent....a form of fasting (the only permissible form at the moment since I'm pregnant) and a way to give up something that in some way distances me from God and allow Him additional connection spots in my life. This year I'm giving up:

• Stress Binging on Bad Foods: This is an embarrassingly wretched behavior I've developed. I get stressed out and instead of (or sometimes in combination with) freaking out, I down a bunch of candy, leftover dessert items, Doritos....etc. Terrible, no good, very bad way. I am going to try to replace this behavior with eating something good for me or drinking water. This is also a subtle way to bless my baby and think charitably of the little one instead of downing toxic levels of less than helpful foods.

• Music to Fill The Spaces: I'm going to give up ambient music from iTunes and playing the radio in the car whenever we drive anywhere. The idea is not at all that music is bad (heaven knows, I love it a lot) but, I think a time of quiet is a good idea. I am hoping it will encourage us to make our own music, help me listen to my kids more and talk to them and just allow a space for peace and silence, the kind of place where scripture tells us the still small voice of God tends to show up.

I'm hoping to do a light form of food fasting and serve fish on Fridays instead of land animal protein which we have all the other nights. I am also trying to make sure to eat fish frequently now for the sake of getting all the Omega 3's that Baby needs for brain development at this stage.

One of my other goals for Lent is to try to find small ways to work charity into my life with my kids. I think there are some practical, kid accessible ways that we can participate in meaningful charity...taking gifts to neighbors, writing cards and letters for sick friends, picking out a little extra at the grocery store for the local food bank....etc. This is however, one of the weak areas of my Lenten plan. If you have ideas about how to teach kids to give to those in need, do share!