"She refused to be bored, chiefly because she wasn't boring." Zelda Fitzgerald

Wednesday, April 20, 2016

Doves, Toddler Storms and Private Troubles

The pair of doves have returned who were setting on their second round of babies last year when we moved into our cottage. We watched them tugging grasses out of the flower beds and hunting for dropped bits of garden twine around the picnic table table while they were working on reinforcing and insulating the nest for the next round of use. And now, there they are, taking turns sitting there again, reminding us that we are going round and round the sun....just about to where we started here in California. Amazing.

Man, are we ever having a doozy of a time convincing Pom to stay calm and listen to limits! Whew. He's a screamer and a venter and a real whiz bang communicator who lets the world know what he wants and how he feels about being refused. Looking for books on teaching children kindness, calmness, gentleness, self-control and on parents staying peaceful in the midst of kid's storms. ("This is not my crisis....this is not my crisis...this is not my crisis....ad infinitum.") Tips? Titles?

Had a good reminder tonight at baseball that everyone around us is fighting battles we cannot see. I am too quick to judge and to label people as "mean" or "harsh" without knowing what makes them guarded and slow to connect. There are things we would never guess around us in the lives and homes and minds of the people we are meeting. We have to remember that none of us and none of "them" are walking around with a pristine, simple, peaceful life. We all have our stuff, and usually people are responding to their environment with the way they behave and talk, none of us is in a vacuum. I have to remember that when I want to get defensive with my labels and my dislike of the people that rub me the wrong way. We all have no idea what those we rub shoulders with are managing.

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