Trying for Stable

Am home and it feels good. A bit overwhelming but good. I spent yesterday soaking in the company of a few friends after stocking up on local raw milk and good fresh eggs from a farmer friend. Family is good but they fill a different tank than my mommy-friend community. It was nice to be back. Had a lot of good discussion, shared some laughs and let our children run wild together in one big squirming heap in the wading pool in front of us.

After the visiting I promptly went home and had a great big panic about the state of the practical things in my home. I washed the dishes before leaving and did all the laundry but there are still 4,000 things that suddenly need doing. How does that happen?!? The tomatoes need tying up, the cucumbers are in desperate need of harvesting, the front of our house looks abandoned for want of string-trimming, there are clothes to sort and put away after all that laundry, suitcases to unpack, a fridge that needs cleaning etc. etc. etc. I am not sure if I feel more inspired and ultra-motivated or overwhelmed and snowed under. Tough to decide sometimes.

I am trying to take today and get my feet under me, make some parts of my home pretty again and begin an organization/sanity restoring plan. There is never time enough to get every little thing in my life in order but I am determined to do the very best I at making productive stabs in the windows of time I get. Life is so punctuated by nursing breaks and potty visits and diaper changes and naps these days that I find it very hard to work on anything very cohesively. I live a pixelated existence with any number of fragmented, mosaic-style goals on my current plate.

Am trying to be in the moment, live easily, speak love and also work ambitiously towards creating the kind of life I mean to live. "Let the standards slip only when you must!" I tell myself, "But never cheapen the standards to make them weak or anemic just because life is full of challenge." Its a tall order but its the path I'm on right now.  I lit a candle, I made a nice To Do List, and I'm hacking away over here. If you feel like bringing an understanding spirit, a load of inspiration and a giant mint-iced tea...feel free to drop by!